Read and know, people of Sandpoint, I, deputy Morvius Krupt, famous for my role in the goblin attack on Sandpoint, the destruction of the Goblin headquarters, and more recently the trial of Tsuto the coward and the investigation of the Sandpoint serial killer "The Skinman," am offering a free introductory martial arts lesson to those interested.
I will review your fighting techniques and physical capability and judge you accordingly. You will receive chastisement on your flaws and a training program to improve. If you are disciplined and worthy, I will train you in the basics of the monastic fighting arts I learned in a mysterious land over the impassable mountains.
Subsequent lessons will not be free, and may require either payment in gold or swearing of loyalty to the Sandpoint law enforcement, serving directly under me. This would consist of swearing loyalty to me.
Age, race, gender, and physical or mental handicaps will not prohibit your training, but you may be judged harshly for them. Only those truly disciplined in mind and body can become monks. Do you have what it takes? I will tell you, in a matter of moments.